


Calling like a Crow

by tiggeryumyum



Series: Post-Karasuno Kagehina [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-15 23:22:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13041654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tiggeryumyum/pseuds/tiggeryumyum
Summary: Everyone is going to college and making new friends, and those who can't are still trying their best.





	Calling like a Crow

A cat is always a cat.

You can train cats, you can train them not to be a cat on counter tops and tables, not to be a cat knocking over the trashcan, or climbing up the curtain, but they will always be a cat, somewhere.

This is comparing cats to dogs, because dogs can be guards, or helpers, or hunters, or, one time, Kageyama saw a special about dogs that work with emergency crews in the mountains, digging through snow to find people who have been buried deep, deep inside after an avalanche.

Dogs can be lots of things.

But a cat is a cat.

"You have to piss."

"What?"

"If you get swept away in an avalanche," Hinata says. "You get disoriented from all the snow, you won't know which way is up, so you if you pee yourself, then you'll know, cause the pee will drip down."

"I'd just spit," Kageyama says.

"But if you're upside down, it'll go up your nose."

Kageyama wrinkles his nose at the thought. There's a scoffing sigh in front of them that means Tsukishima is slipping on his headphones. 

In first year, Yamaguchi would've laughed like he always did when Tsukishima was an asshole, but now he just elbows Tsukishima softly while grinning.

Tsukishima does things he doesn't want to all the time. 

He didn't even like volleyball the entire first season, but he still played. And then he decided to get better at it, and did. He's going to study business in college, even though he said he didn't really care for the subject. He'll do it, and be successful, and graduate, and maybe he'll play volleyball at the same time. He hasn't decided yet.

They're on the bus to Tokyo, to nationals. Everyone in Karasuno has been training every extra hour they have, during lunches and after school until it gets dark, during weekends and through birthdays. Everyone is in peak condition, their bodies thrumming with energy, primed and strong and healthy 

Volleyball is the most important thing for everyone on the bus, right now.

On the way back, it will not be. 

On the way back, everyone but the regulars will have already stopped caring, because win or lose in Tokyo this week, they won't have any say in it. 

As third years, Tsukishima and Yamaguchi, and Hinata and Kageyama will not be expected to show up in the gym anymore. Tsukishima and Yamaguchi will probably take advantage of that immediately. Weeks will go by and the regulars in the lower grades will start showing up late, leaving early, because they would like a break. They'll grow lazy in practice, packing the net away earlier and earlier as the end of the school year gets closer, setting aside their enthusiasm until next year.

Kageyama has learned that it's alright to want to practice volleyball as much as you did before a tournament for a week, or two weeks, or maybe even a month, but eventually it wears thin, like someone who won't take down Christmas lights. Teammates will stare with increasing annoyance and impatience, until they have enough and drift away to focus on other things that matter to them, for however long they like.

But Kageyama is Kageyama and a cat is a cat. 

~

Hinata likes whatever is in front of his face. 

Hinata invites Kageyama to join his friends one Saturday in summer, after high school but before college, and Kageyama does. 

He sits beside Hinata, feeling awkward while the rest of them talk, and as they wait for their orders at a cafe to arrive, Hinata's friend shows them a pen he bought. It has twelve different colors. Hinata calls it cool, wants to hold it, and on the receipt, he writes out his name in orange, his friend's name in blue and Kageyama's in black. 

"It wasn't cool," Kageyama tells him, on the walk to the train.

"Yeah it was!!"

"Yachi has one with six colors. You see her use it all the time."

"Six isn't _twelve_! It's cool."

Kageyama rolls his eyes.

"It was the _moment_ , Souryama."

"Whatever."

Kageyama doesn't show Hinata pens, or get him presents, or anything else. He sends Hinata tosses. Tosses are half, spikes are the other half, and together they make an attack. An attack is half, and defense is the other half, and together they make a game of volleyball.

There's no one on the other side of the net when they finish stretching today. They are practicing volleyball, because they cannot play volleyball. They won't ever play the game together again, as far as Kageyama knows. Hinata is not going to the same college as Kageyama. 

A pen with twelve colors is eleven times more of a pen than it needs to be, but a toss is only a quarter of what Hinata wants to do.

Still, Hinata seems to like them. 

~

Kageyama read an article that said there's a limit to how many friends a person can have. It's 250 people.

"Dunbar number," Sugawara says.

"Eh?"

"It's the number of people someone can have a meaningful relationship with," Sugawara says. "That's what you meant, right?"

"That's not true," Hinata says. "I have way more friends than that!"

"No you don't," Kageyama says, using the same scoffing voice he does whenever Hinata says something impossible and stupid.

"Yeah, I do – " Hinata is confident until he pulls out his phone. "Well. _Almost!_ "

Hinata has 238 contacts. Kageyama watches as he scrolls through them, and sees _Kageyama_ between _Kagami_ and _Kaku-kun-kun_. Kageyama's never met either of these virtual neighbors. 

Kageyama has twenty contacts on his phone. Three of them are Hinata – one is his actual number, and two of them old numbers from years and phone plans previous. Kageyama deletes the dud numbers, and has eighteen contacts.

He doesn't see Hinata for three weeks, and when they meet up again, he has 243 contacts. There was a project in his science class, and they were split into groups of six, which for Hinata means he has five new friends. Kageyama wonders how many group projects Hinata will have over the next three years.

"What happens when you reach 250 people??" Hinata had asked Sugawara, who had shrugged.

"Well. You can't remember _everyone_ you've ever met."

~

College is the springtime of your life. Classes are harder, but the workload is way less than it was in high school, and Kageyama finds himself faced with chunks of time throughout the day that didn't exist before, to do with however he likes: an hour between classes, two hours between the end of class and the beginning of practice. Hours and hours between the end of practice and going to class the next morning. Entire weekends. He could fill this all with volleyball, and this is his first instinct, but. Maybe. There's enough time now for him to play, nearly unlimited, that the constant itch for more is rubbed raw, and he could see. Maybe. Doing something else in one or two of those extra hours.

A group project in English breaks his class into fours. 

It's sort of like a team, because they have to work together to perform, but not like volleyball, because Kageyama is fucking terrible. He remembers how egoless Hinata could be, at times, about his lack of skill, and how that allowed him to actually help the team. 

His team today is three strangers, who are very polite. They're speaking over one another, very quickly, in chipper, agreeable voices that remind Kageyama of Yachi when she gets distressed. 

"I'm really excited about this project – !"

"Me too! I think we'll do well, I'm glad to see you with us, Saku-chan!"

"I already have ideas! But I'm excited to hear all of yours – "

"Yeah, I think we have a really strong group here – "

"I barely know kanji and I'm even worse at English," Kageyama blurts out defensively, hunched a little over his open book. "I'll do my best, but sorry in advance."

There's a beat of stunned, blinking silence. 

One of the girls covers her mouth, hiding a snort. Laughter follows, and Kageyama feels it prickling against his skin like sharp, tiny needles. 

"Tobio, right?" asks the other girl.

Kageyama forces himself to nod.

"Well, to tell the truth... I didn't fully understand what sensei was saying our goal was for this project," she says, rubbing at the back of her neck.

"I'm not… super familiar with this subject either," says the other girl. "But – I'm going to work hard, too."

Kageyama blinks, glancing at the group. They seem more relaxed than they did before. They weren't laughing at him, he realizes. It's so surprising that it's not until they finish the session, and he gets back to his dorm, laying down, going over the night in his mind, that he feels happy about it.

They create a group chat, and Kageyama gets three new contacts on his phone – totaling 21. He wakes up, and all week he has notifications waiting on his lockscreen, the three of them all talking to one another, not just about studying or their project. They talk casually, about nothing in particular. When Kageyama contributes, they usually respond with rows of laughing emoticons. 

He doesn't talk about volleyball, he knows better than that. He waits for one of them to say something he can respond to.

Figuring out what to say was hard when he was younger, but he sits with his phone in front of him on the library table between classes, watching the conversation appear on his phone, one sentence at a time, and thinks he must have gotten better. This isn't as bad as he remembered. Practicing a sport makes you a better player, and maybe the past three years spending time with Hinata have been practice for him, too. 

**Toko** :  
Bring your appetite!! I'm gonna bring some of my homemade takoyaki for studying tonight!

 **Me:**  
No.

 **Saku** :  
lol, Tobio!

 **Meri-san** :  
TACT, Tobio-kun! LOL!  
But I also just ate ¯\\_( ◉ 3 ◉ )_/¯  
Sorry!

The day after they finish their project, they talk about going for drinks, and Kageyama is included. 

He spends four evenings getting drinks with them.

Then there's a small fight about different types of ramen. 

He calls one of the girls a dumbass. 

Kageyama is at his best when he's talking to other volleyball players, but still hard to get along with. He's worse with guys who don't play, and even worse than that with girls. The worst is children, and animals. 

The conversation goes quiet in surprise, and Kageyama mumbles out an apology but the room feels chilly the rest of the night.

He doesn't get notifications on his phone for the next two days, and when he checks, he sees he's been removed from the chat.

"It wasn't just the dumbass thing," Saku says when they see each other on campus, but Kageyama didn't ask. He wonders if there were other chilly silences he hadn't noticed, then is immediately sure there were, and wonders how many. "That whole asshole schtick is funny at first, but it gets old. You should try to develop an actual personality."

Kageyama stares at his shoes, then keeps walking.

Kageyama remembers wanting friends, when he was very young. 

He remembers watching his classmates play together, and not knowing how to join them. He remembers feeling hot in the face and awkward when he approached, and he remembers spending lunch with his forehead on his desk, his fists shaking, pressed against his knees. He remembers one of his teachers telling him to hurry and wash his face in the bathroom, so the other children won't know he was crying, but he does not remember what made him cry, and he doesn't remember why he wanted friends.

~

There are five practice games scheduled over the next month, and then tournament season begins.

The team is geared up and ready to climb onto the bus for their first match, and anyone passing by the gym would have to assume the coach was speaking into any empty room from how completely quiet and still they grow when he pulls out the whiteboard, filled with circles and kanji representing the starting line up for the year.

The setter circle is there, in the vanguard, but it's not labeled K or T or Kageyama or Tobio. The setter circle is labeled E, for Ebisu, the second year setter. 

Ebisu was the starting setter last year, and has established routines with the rest of the team. Kageyama could learn them, his coach expects him to by the end of the season, but he says he's not going to pick Kageyama "just for something flashy and new." Kageyama can "take a year to observe your senpai" and "try to learn something." 

This is frustrating, and Kageyama does not like it, but yes, he can.

They drive out to the match, Kageyama watches the first set and the second set from the box, then the game is over and he climbs back onto the bus. It's dark by the time they make it back, and he spots Ebisu alone in the locker room. 

"Ebisu-san."

Ebisu looks up from checking the contents of his gym bag. "Kageyama?"

"I want you to know," he says. "I'm not giving up on the starting setter position."

"Oh?" Ebisu asks, raising an eyebrow, crossing his arms on top of his knees.

"I'm – going to earn the trust of the team, and play as setter."

"I see," Ebisu says. He smiles. "Thanks for the warning, I guess."

Kageyama nods, but something doesn't feel right. That's not how it was supposed to go. He should probably say something else, state himself clearer, but doesn't know the words would do it. He nods a second time, and leaves.

~

" - what do you expect, he took his team to nationals three years in a row. He's gonna have an ego."

"I know, it's just – throwing his weight around like that. It's fucking obnoxious." 

"You know, I heard this rumor about him way back in junior high – "

~

In bed, Kageyama puts his face into the pillow and he thinks back to first year at Karasuno. 

He sought out Sugawara, like he had Ebisu. Back then, they both agreed they weren't going to give up the setter's position. He replays that conversation in his head, what he can remember of it. The words have faded from his mind, but he remembers it ended, somehow, with Sugawara putting a hand on Kageyama's shoulder, smiling like he was proud they were on the same team.

It has been several months, and Kageyama is confident that none of his new teammates feel that way about him today. 

He hasn't gotten better at all, and he can't believe how stupid he was to hope otherwise. 

Kageyama practices, but more than any new skill on the court, he is learning that rejection can come in smaller, quieter ways than having backs turned to him during a game. 

The team is loyal to Ebisu, and they do not want Kageyama's tosses, so outside of structured practices organized by the coach where they have no choice, Kageyama spends most of his practices serving, receiving, and spiking. The toss is the call, and the spike is the answer. Kageyama still has thoughts and opinions, but he's not the setter and it's not his place to call those out. All he can do is jump in answer, when he's called on. 

Bending his head in library, Kageyama scowls down at the book on the table, expression monstrous. What's a Tyrant King if he's not a king anymore? Just an asshole?

~

"Who's Saku?"

"Classmate."

"Girlfriend?"

"Classmate," Kageyama repeats, knocking the top of Hinata's head with his fist, and taking his phone back.

"Did you get in a fight??"

"No." A fight is a loud thing. What happened was quiet and quick and completely, completely painless.

"Why'd they all stop texting you?"

Kageyama deletes the dead group chat from months ago. He feels anger, but it's cold. "Because."

Hinata is quiet, tapping the top of his own phone with two fingers, staring thoughtfully. Kageyama will be mean if he asks more questions. He's tensing up, waiting for it.

"Wanna give me some tosses?"

Kageyama feels like a band wrapped tight and squeezing his chest was snipped off, flying away with all the pressure from the sudden release. He inhales sharply in relief. He nods.

Hinata is starting on his team. 

He's a wing spiker again, and when he says he wants to be called the ace before he graduates, Kageyama thinks it might actually happen. His growth at Karasuno was explosive, but even as he improved, he still practiced just as hard as he did when he joined as a first year, trailing hopelessly behind. This dedication has made him strong and capable.

"Aaaw, I forgot how good your tosses feel!!" Hinata says, holding his hand in a fist, eyes shining. "You're gonna spoil me!!"

"Maybe I should send you shitty tosses instead," Kageyama grins.

"You probably should," Hinata says, seriously. Kageyama frowns. "Like, regular tosses."

Kageyama looks at the ball in his hands.

He can't give Hinata anything but this. They're special. No one else can do them. The better Hinata gets at hitting shitty, normal, non-Kageyama tosses, the more he will grow and change, the less he will need Kageyama. But Kageyama will keep being Kageyama.

"Come on, Kageyama-kun!! I can't depend on you forever!"

Kageyama tosses, lower than Hinata likes. 

Hinata misses, and thanks him. "I'll get the next one!" he vows.

Kageyama knows.

~

 **Hinata** :  
GROUP!!! CHAT!!!!!!!

 **Tsukishima** :  
Who gave you this number

 **Hinata** :  
uuuuhhhhhh  
you??

 **Tsukishima** :  
And who are you?

 **Yamaguchi** :  
tsukki that's cold

 **Hinata** :  
≖д≖

 **Tsukishima** :  
Oh. 

**Hinata** :  
Did you really delete my number???

 **Tsukishima** :  
Does that surprise you?

 **Yamaguchi** :  
Tsukki  
( •᷄⌓•᷅ )

 **Tsukishima** :  
What  
It's not like i blocked him

 **Tsukishima** :  
If you want to know the truth I had to replace my sim card  
So I lost my entire contact list  
and if you're upset about it then it's your fault for not texting me until now  
Because that was months ago

 **Hinata** :  
I'll text you WEEKLY  
from now on!!

 **Tsukishima** :  
please do not.

Kageyama blinks at the messages on his phone, struggling to fully separate his brain from heavy, deep sleep. By the time he manages, he realizes he's smiling.

Hinata and Tsukishima snip at each other all day, with occasional commentary from Yamaguchi, and Kageyama sends one or two between classes.

He doesn't wait, watching the screen for their responses, and they don't reply with rows of laughing faces, but he knows they won't block him, either. 

~

An avalanche moves at 80 miles per hour. 

Kageyama spent the entire time during the special imagining what he would do to survive if he was ever caught in that situation – running very fast would obviously not work, but maybe curling up, protecting his head, or maybe fighting against it, trying to struggle to the top to avoid getting submerged. 

But he knows, actually, there's only one thing that happens when you get hit by a wall of destruction moving 80 miles per hour.

"This isn't because of anything you've done," says the coach. "Or haven't done. And I still intend to use you as a sub when Ebisu-kun is unable to play – and as a pitch server you always deliver. But I have to keep in mind the dynamics of the team, and they simply won't perform like they are with another setter. Even one as technically brilliant as yourself."

Obviously, the coach would like them to continue to perform just as they are. The months of hard work ended up taking them to the Intercollegiate Championship, where they were eventually beaten in the semi-finals. Both their libero and ace were acknowledged with awards in the closing ceremonies. It was a solid performance. Kageyama knows, he watched it all happen from the warm up box.

"I just wanted to give you a heads up," the coach continues. "I've seen how hard you've been working. Continue as you are, and please don't get discouraged."

Kageyama nods. 

Semester break is so close students can practically feel the warmth of it on their skin, luring them closer and closer to the end of the week. The only goal they have now is to start preparing for next season, their next chance at the championship, but, for the rest of the team, it's too distant to care. 

Kageyama continues to practice, alone.

~

" – saw him in the gym. There's no practice today, right?"

"Nope. I don't know what he's trying to prove."

"Ugh, he's probably still gunning for Ebisu-san's spot next season."

"Don't even joke about that."

"He came from a powerhouse school, you know. Went to nationals."

"Really? As a _setter_?"

"Yep."

"But he's so… freaking awkward… "

"I know. But we still have one more year with Ebisu-san!"

~

Kageyama will have important things that matter in his life again, starting the year after next.

Until then he will continue as he is. 

He'll complete his classes, and he'll practice spikes, serves, and receives.

There is nothing else.

~

Hinata's team made it to the quarterfinals during the championships, three games more than Kageyama reached. Hinata spiked, hitting shitty, regular, non-Kageyama tosses. He wonders how many people are in Hinata's contact list now. It has to be over 250. Kageyama wonders how many people Hinata has forgotten. 

**Me** :  
Want some tosses

 **Hinata** :  
!!!  
Y E AH!!  
Really??  
right now??

 **Me** :  
yeah

 **Hinata** :  
on my way!!!!!!  
ᕕ( ◎_◎)ᕗ

 **Tsukishima** :  
it's fucking  
2am?!?

 **Hinata** :  
ε=ε=ε=ε=ε=ε=ᕕ( ◎_◎)ᕗ

~

"If you're just looking at the last point then it was our libero," Hinata says, spinning the volleyball on his finger during a break. Bugs swarm in the light of the park's lights, and the darkness that surrounds them makes it feel like center court, with the bright lights of the stage above. 

"Your libero is solid."

"Yeah, so, I think the biggest problem was the second set," Hinata says.

"Your team is mostly first years," Kageyama says. "Not much endurance."

"Yeah, exactly, and those rallies – "

"They just waited you out."

"They were so strong!! It reminded me of playing Nekoma, those – freaking demon rallies!!" 

"I thought of Seijou," Kageyama says. 

"Yeah, the point count got pretty up there," Hinata says, scowling. He flops backward with a groan. "Next time we'll win!! And you'll play next year, right?"

Kageyama looks across the court, and thinks about lying, but why?

"No."

"What? Are you _quitting_?"

Kageyama gives him a look of disgust.

"Then wha – no way they're using the same setter again next year??"

"Ebisu-san has the trust of the team."

"This isn't fair!" Hinata jumps to his feet. "When we defeat your team next year, it won't even count if you're not on it!!"

"I'll be pitch serving."

"Then I'll receive all of them!!" Hinata says immediately, looking wild eyed in frustration, and it's cathartic to watch, the pure, uncomplicated annoyance flowing freely from Hinata's mouth, while it gums up Kageyama's insides like tar. "Let's practice that now, Kageyama!"

"Are you sure?" Kageyama laughs meanly, climbing to his feet. He's had little else to do but perfect his serve over the past year. It's become vicious. 

" _Yes!_ " Hinata shouts, and is already moving, darting under the net to the other side of the court.

"See if you can receive this without falling on your ass."

"Falling on my ass is part of my system, Kageyama! You know that!!"

Kageyama watches him get into position, and bounces the ball once, thoughtfully.

"What would you do," Kageyama asks. "If you actually manage to beat me?"

"The same thing I do every time I beat you," Hinata says, boasting. "Beat you again!" 

"You've never – "

"I beat you to the gym all the time!" Hinata says, quickly, like he was waiting for the chance. "I beat you in a vertical jump, and I beat you eating onigiri, _and_ getting better when we both had the flu last year! _And_ I got more confessions on graduation!"

Kageyama blinks.

"All of those count! And there's lots more I can't even remember."

"… And you'll never get tired of that?" Kageyama says, looking carefully at the ball. 

"What, are you trying to call a truce or something?"

Kageyama scoffs, tosses the ball, takes the three swift steps before jumping to meet it, slamming his palm through it, and it shoots like a bullet toward Hinata's side of the court.

Hinata dives, both arms outstretched, absorbing the impact and sending it flying back toward the net, neatly. 

"Ha!" Hinata says, climbing to his feet. "One more!"

So Kageyama sends him one more. 

It doesn't seem like either of them will get tired of it any time soon.


End file.
